Category Archives: Books and Short Stories

I’m glad monkeys don’t fly!

ONCE UPON A TIME THERE AS A BOY NAMED ASHER
HE WAS VERY CLEVER AND HE WAS VERY CURLY
HE HAD THREE MONKEYS
AKIVA, BEN, AND MIA

THE MONKEYS LIVED ON THE CEILING
BUT ASHER LIVED IN A SECRET ROOM
BEHIND THE FIREPLACE
AND HIS MOMMY AND DADDY WERE FOREVER TRYING TO FIND HIM
BUT ASHER WAS GOOD AT HIDING AND MAKING NO NOISE
WHILE HE WATCHED THE MONKEYS
WHO WERE HANGING FROM THE UPSIDE DOWN TREES
THAT GREW OUT OF THE CEILING

AKIVA LIVED IN AN APPLE TREE
BEN LIVED IN A PLUM TREE
MIA LIVED IN A LEMON TREE
BUT MOMMY AND DADDY LIVED ON THE FLOOR
IN A LARGE CARDBOARD BOX THAT SAID
“THIS SIDE UP” ON THE BOTTOM OF IT

IN HIS SECRET ROOM ASHER HAD A GRAND PIANO
AND LATE AT NIGHT HE LIKED TO PLAY IT
HIS FAVORITE PIECE WAS “HAPPY BIRTHDAY”
WHICH HE PLAYED EVERY DAY
HOPING THAT HE WOULD GET PRESENTS AND CAKE

BUT NO MATTER HOW MUCH HE HOPED
NOTHING HAPPENED
ASHER WAS SO SAD THAT HE STAYED IN HIS ROOM
AND PLAYED THE “MOONLIGHT SONATA” ONE THOUSAND TIMES
AND THEN HE PLAYED IT BACKWARDS
AND HE EVEN PLAYED IT UPSIDE DOWN
SO THE THREE MONKEYS COULD HEAR IT PROPERLY BECAUSE
THEY LIVED UPSIDE DOWN, LIKE AUSTRALIANS

THEN ONE DAY A LOT OF PEOPLE CAME TO ASHER’S HOUSE
THE THREE MONKEYS CAME DOWN FROM THEIR TREES AND WALKED ON THE FLOOR
THEY LEFT THEIR TAILS UP IN THE TREES
BECAUSE THEY DIDN’T WANT PEOPLE TO STEP ON THEM
MOMMY AND DADDY CAME OUT OF THE BIG BOX
AND PUT CLOTHES ON SO PEOPLE COULDN’T SEE THEIR LONG FURRY TAILS
BECAUSE NOBODY KNEW THEY WERE FROM AUSTRALIA
WHERE IT’S SO HOT THAT YOU CAN’T WEAR
CLOTHES AND EVERYBODY SLEEPS ALL DAY
AND GOES OUT AT NIGHT

ASHER LOOKED OUT HIS WINDOW
THAT WAS BEHIND ONE OF THE BRICKS THAT
ALL LOOKED THE SAME BUT WEREN’T
BECAUSE ONE OF THEM WAS SEE THROUGH

ASHER SAW THE PEOPLE
HE SAW PRESENTS
HE SAW CAKE
HE STOPPED PLAYING “MOONLIGHT SONATA”
HE PUT ON HIS CLOTHES TOO
BECAUSE ALL THE PEOPLE HAD THEIR
CLOTHES ON FOR SOME STRANGE REASON
AND THEN, WHEN NOBODY WAS LOOKING
HE CAME DOWN THE CHIMNEY TO SEE WHAT THE
BIG FUSS WAS ALL ABOUT

EVERYONE WAS SMILING AND TALKING AT THE SAME TIME
IT WAS VERY NOISY, ESPECIALLY THE THREE MONKEYS
AKIVA, BEN AND MIA WERE JUMPING UP AND DOWN AND LOOKING
EVERYWHERE FOR A BANANA
BUT ASHER HAD HIDDEN ALL THE BANANAS
IN A BIG PILE OF DIRT
THAT HE KEPT IN HIS GARAGE
WHERE HE COLLECTED WORMS

AND WHEN EVERYBODY SAW ASHER THEY SMILED
AND THEY SQUEEZED HIS NOSE
TICKLED HIS BELLY BUTTON
AND RUBBED HIS CURLY HAIR
FOR GOOD LUCK
AND BECAUSE
AT LAST
AFTER ALL THE THOUSANDS OF TIMES
ASHER PLAYED HIS FAVORITE SONG
WHICH WAS……    WHAT WAS IT?

OH YES
IT WAS
IT WAS
WHAT WAS IT?
OH YES IT WAS, WAS IT, COULD IT BE?
YES, IT WAS!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

AND THEN THEY GAVE ASHER PRESENTS
AND THEY ATE SOME CAKE
AND THE MONKEYS MADE A MESS
BUT NOBODY MINDED
AND EVERYBODY SANG ASHER’S FAVORITE
SONG, YOU KNOW IT TOO
DON’T YOU KNOW IT?
WELL IT’S NOT YOUR BIRTHDAY TODAY IS IT?

BUT ONE DAY IT WILL BE YOUR TURN
EVEN IF YOU ARE A MONKEY
OR FROM AUSTRALIA, SO
HAPPY BIRTHDAY EVERYBODY
AND ASHER TOO
AND MARY LOU

THE END